Dear Spammers

1. I am not depressed

2. I am not so fat that I have to pump my body with unhealthy chemicals so that I can look like whoever the current hot chick that everyone worships is. I am a grandmother, for heaven’s sake. Get over it! Beauty contests are so over for me.

3. If I want to feel good, I go for a walk, read a good book, call up a friend or a family member, see a movie, write a letter, listen to music I love. I am lucky enough to be blessed with an optimistic mood and natural chemicals that keep me that way. I do not need your chemicals to do it for me.

4. That part of my anatomy you want to increase the size of– I don’t know how to break it to you, but I DON’T HAVE IT! I am a female and if you haven’t learned basic anatomy, why do you think you need to be teaching ME something!

5. On a recent trip to China I bought 16 replica luxury brand watches for about $2 a piece, most of which I have given as gifts. The one I’m wearing is working so I don’t need yours for $179.95.

6. Get a life! I don’t care what you do with yours, but stay out of mine.

Whew!! I feel better. May not even need that walk….

oh and if you want to go to China…

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  1. Anonymous says

    All your Chinese trips– they need to give you a diplomatic position. You have you many great ideas.

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