If the office and the school are places where we hold ourselves together, put on a good face, act \u00e2\u20ac\u0153normal,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d even polite, then the home, is the place where it all hangs out\u00e2\u20ac\u201dwhere suddenly we don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have to be \u00e2\u20ac\u0153together\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or friendly or polite, or even nice. To some extent, that it true, I suppose, although kindness, politeness, and good cheer are probably more important at home than anywhere else, because, after all, aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t we trying to have our closest, most satisfying relationships with the people with whom we live? In healthy families, we give our parents, siblings, and children some latitude to express their anger, hurt, pain, fury, rage, but in verbal ways. We don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t allow hitting or destruction of property. Part of the job of parent is teaching coping skills so that negative emotions can be expressed in socially acceptable ways that harm no one. So we teach our child that instead of saying, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I hate my brother\/sister and wish he\/she would die\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I feel very angry with my brother\/sister.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Later on, if the parent does a good job, the child will learn to affix a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153now\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to the end of the sentence which then acknowledges the possibility of a future rapprochement.<\/p>\n
There is another place where people feel free to be themselves: the internet. All you need is a hotmail\/gmail\/yahoo account, with your favorite alias name \u00e2\u20ac\u0153topcat 672\u00e2\u20ac\u009d- and you are in business. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Topcat” then can join mailing lists and begin stirring up trouble. He can pose as an expert on psychiatry on one list and on iron smelting on another. He can be a movie stuntman, a physicist, and the president of his local Rotary Club. He can write about his vast experience, take on the role of expert, and when questioned, write scathing, ad hominem replies. Recently I have seen innocent people on a listserve terrorized by a member who insists on misinterpreting what they write in the worst possible way.<\/p>\n
DrSavta\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s mailing list survival hints:
\n1.\tAlways be skeptical of someone who uses a name that isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t a real name (e.g., \u00e2\u20ac\u0153topcat\u00e2\u20ac\u009d).
\n2.\tWhen someone is a new member of a mailing list and suddenly starts posting a lot, watch out for trouble
\n3.\tWhen the person begins to become outrageous, simply correct any misinterpretation he\/she may have made of what you said and DO NOT respond to him\/her
\n4.\tThe fewer responses, the sooner he\/she will go away (with his\/her tail between his\/her legs.)<\/p>\n
And one more thing, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want to violate my own rule and so I will tell you about the name DrSavta.<\/p>\n
My real name (posted at the bottom of each page) is Rona Michelson. Two miraculous things happened to me in the 1990s. The first is that I became a Savta (grandmother in Hebrew). The second is that I received my doctorate in social work from the University of Pennsylvania. It is because of these two wonderful things, one which came as a gift and the other after hard work, that I adopted the internet name of DrSavta. (and now you know the rest of the story\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6.)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
If the office and the school are places where we hold ourselves together, put on a good face, act \u00e2\u20ac\u0153normal,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d even polite, then the home, is the place where it all hangs out\u00e2\u20ac\u201dwhere suddenly we don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have to be \u00e2\u20ac\u0153together\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or friendly or polite, or even nice. To some extent, that it true, I suppose, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-53","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-interpersonal-relationships","entry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/53","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=53"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/53\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=53"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=53"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/drsavta.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=53"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}