Are you one of those people who gets many calls each week asking you to participate in a survey? Does the person on the other side of the phone speak too quickly and have a really bad speech impediment? Here is a sample of what I imagine might happen if I gave them the chance…

I am doing a survey on banking. Do you mind if I ask a few questions?
What bank do you use?
Does your whole salary go into that bank? (I hear salivating)
Do you have horaot kevah (automatic payment of bills)? (More salivating)
Do you have any investments with that bank? (Heavy breathing)
What would a fair estimate of how much you make each month be? (More heavy breathing)
What percentage of your income goes into your savings? (Did I hear her say, “Jackpot!”?)
When you chose a password for your account, how did you come up with something you could remember but others couldn’t guess? (I think I heard her drop the phone and run out the door.)

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  1. Found your blog from one of my favorites, Israel Matzav. Enjoyed reading about your happiness in Israel among your children and one sister, who I assumed by now make Aliyah. Wishes for a Shana Tova and tons of brochos for the coming year.

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