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Preparations

September 28, 2008 by

Tomorrow night it begins– Rosh HaShana, the New Year. And, as usual, it will be a busy and full holiday with my son and his 6 children staying with us, with both daughters and their families joining us for a meal each, not to mention the 3rd of our 2 daughters and her family who will join us also for a meal.

I actually enjoy cooking and when I designed my kitchen I made sure to have a huge working area on one counter. It stretches about 7 feet long. Today I filled the entire area with flour, oil, sugar, salt , potatoes, baking soda, eggs, corn, vanilla, soy milk, margarine, a food processor, a mixer, and various measuring implements. The oven performed overtime heating one after another of the creations (challah, potato kugel, corn pudding). The fridge will soon be filled as it plays home to all of the vegetables, the defrosting turkey, and roast, and all that I’ve made today once it all cools down.

And tomorrow it will be soups (chicken and sweet potato), the turkey and the roast, probably cole slaw and potato salad, and of course all of the salad vegetables. Then it’s opening out the table, setting it, making up all of the beds, and general cleanup.

It all seemed overwhelming until I had a realization: We are celebrating the creation of the world. I can’t help thinking of all of the preparation G-d had to do for Rosh HaShana. There was the heaven and the earth to create, the lights (sun and moon), the seas, the plants and trees, the fish and the birds, and humankind. … and I think that I have a lot to attend to?

Instead, I think I will say that He did an excellent job, with only a short amount of time to work with. Sure there were areas that could have used more thought (teeth and feet come to mind) and there’s that whole nine months of pregnancy thing not to mention other womanly issues, but all and all, job well done! The blue sky- gorgeous, the cleansing, life-giving rains- brilliant, the variety of flowers, trees, bushes- exquisite, the ability to give and receive love with family members and friends- perfection.

I remember reading e. e. cummings who said:
I thank you God for this most amazing day, for the leaping greenly spirits of trees, and for the blue dream of sky and for everything which is natural, which is infinite, which is yes.

Shana Tovah– may you and your family have a healthy, happy, new year!

Filed Under: Family life, Israel, Ramblings, Spirituality

Today, it rained

September 26, 2008 by

Somehow, that doesn’t make headlines in the US, but when you live in the middle of a desert, the first rain of the season is always big news. On the Israel bulletin boards, on facebook, people are celebrating the rain. It occurred for the first time when I was in the supermarket. I heard people talking about rain, but when I looked outside, it was sunny and bright. As I headed for the bakery, the security guard at the bank, with whom I have a relationship that goes something like “Shabbat Shalom” and “Chag Sameach” [Good Sabbath” and “Happy Holiday”] told me “It rained!” I looked at the sky. I looked at the dry ground, and I said, “I don’t believe you.” He said, “Yes, really, only a for a minute or two, but it rained!”

I walked out to the open area where a book sale was in progress. No sign of rain.

I walked to the car. When I got in I saw the telltale signs of an early rain– muddy spots on the windshield. The first rains catch all of the dust that has been floating in the air (and into our sinuses and lungs) all spring and summer and deposit in on our cars.

I drove home and as I entered the house, the telephone rang, “It’s pouring!!!” one of my daughters exclaimed. I didn’t believe her. The sky looked bright. But then I looked out at the glass roof of our enclosed porch and there was indeed rain dripping across it.

But within a couple of minutes, the rain was once again gone. All that was left was (yes, you guessed right) the muddy remains on our glass roof.

Rain here is really thought of as a blessing and after two dry winters, we are ready to take whatever it entails to replenish our water supplies.

So to my friends and relatives in Israel, may you have many rainy days!

Filed Under: Israel, Ramblings

More stuff

September 24, 2008 by

It’s another bright day. One summer, when my sister was visiting, I had the TV on and there was a weather person giving the forecast. My sister found it amusing. After all, she pointed out, what is there to say? “Hot and sunny today, sunny and hot tomorrow, outlook for the weekend, sunny and hot with hot and sunny weather predicted for the beginning of next week.” Actually, in recent years they have added that the temperatures are either “hotter than normal,” “normal, or “below normal.” Of course that presupposes that one knows what “normal” is. Here in the middle east the sun and heat are our permanent residents from some time in April or May until some time in October or November. And, as I have said in previous years, the first rainfall is met with smiles.

Our renovations have not yet begun. Two contractors have been here to see what we want done and to give us estimates on the work. Each spent a lot of time with us. One called us and said he could do parts of the work, but not all of it. The second has not gotten back to us at all. We have two more scheduled to come.

Of course with the end of the shmitta year coming up, I am very excited about the prospects of planting new flowers and shrubs and maybe even trees in our garden. The inability to improve the garden this year has left it looking kind of sad.

I also have been busy making yet another baby blanket. This one is for the adorable Mr. Elazar. The weather being what it is, I think he will be able to wait for it to be done without feeling too cold!

I am more aware than ever that I have a serious (and expensive) addiction: travel. We were away for 6 weeks and returned at the end of July. It is now the 24th of September and I really want to go away somewhere… anywhere. And the last few weeks have been anything but boring. We’ve had time with the grandchildren, visits with friends, two new little people joining the family, contact with old friends… It’s just this wanderlust that I have. I think about China and how happy I am when I am there. It is so very beautiful. I think of Vietnam and its quiet (except for Hanoi and Saigon) beauty. I think of Cambodia and the incredible temples of Angkor. And every memory makes me crave another trip even more!

Filed Under: Ramblings

Stuff

September 22, 2008 by

I might go on strike. I might just not write another blog post until a get another few people to go on my trip to Vietnam and Cambodia. So get working, people!

In other news… Last night Ariel celebrated his 11th birthday with much fanfare and fireworks. He had 20 of his nearest and dearest friends over for a movie and pizza. We, the old folks, sat outside on the front steps for the duration of the movie. With us were Ariel’s 3 little sisters and his tiny little brother (the aforementioned Elazar). With us also was one of Ariel’s friends who apparently found Ariel’s sister Tamar much more interesting than the movie. Tamar is 7 years old and has such sparkle in her that it may actually be that rooms light up when she walks in. We all knew that the boys would find her something special, but we never thought that it would happen by age 7.

And moving from the sublime to the ridiculous… Why is it that men think that when they are in their car no one can see them picking their noses? I think about 50% of the time I am stopped at a light next to a man, he is so engaged. Today, one was sitting in our local supermarket parking lot, totally oblivious… I ask my husband (who does NOT pick his nose) why. He said, “because men only have two hands.” which led me to ask, “and what are they doing with their other hand?” at which point he grinned…

OK, we’ve been married 42 years and so we get each other’s jokes. If you didn’t, it really doesn’t matter.

It’s still hot and the holidays are around the corner– so off to all of the work I’ve been avoiding. And once more, repeat after me: “Vietnam & Cambodia, November 24”

Filed Under: Family life, Ramblings

Who’s afraid of Sarah Palin?

September 15, 2008 by

I’m trying to understand it. I’m trying to understand why people are so frightened by Sarah Palin. Because I can only think that fear is driving otherwise rational people to write and speak in ways they themselves never would have dreamed they would.

I remember when Barry Goldwater was running for president. All of the people I knew were convinced that if he won, we would have a nuclear war. No one trashed him, mocked him, or denigrated him the way they are doing it to Sarah Palin. I don’t get it.

I don’t get that if she made a personal decision to continue a pregnancy with a child with disabilities that that means she would force others to make the same choice. She never said that. She never tried to impose her will on others. In fact, in good feminist tradition, she took control of her own body and decided what she wanted to do. Isn’t that “choice?”

But that isn’t the only thing people are angry at. They have hundreds of justifications for why she is unfit. I remember a long time ago one of my professors taught us that one reason is sufficient– and if there are a large number of reasons, then we call that rationalization.

What do *I* think? I am not sure it matters at all, except when I vote. I can tell you this: I am not afraid of Sarah Palin. I actually think that she is refreshingly real. And she surely is not what those who fear her make her out to be. If I were going to rant, she wouldn’t be the one I would rant about.

Filed Under: Ramblings

…and sometimes, just like that, He changes His mind

September 14, 2008 by

I have seen a decent number of films in my life. One of them that became iconic for me was “The Frisco Kid.” In it, a young, somewhat foolish, certainly naive new rabbi is sent by his eastern European yeshiva to serve a congregation in San Francisco. Our hero, played by Gene Wilder, arrives in the US in Philadelphia and the film covers his journey across the US where he meets the Amish (and thinks they are chassidim), a thief (Harrison Ford), and Indians, among others. He has many adventures.

At one point, the Indians, having decided that he was worthy of continuing to live because of his courage in preserving his sefer torah, ask him to ask his G-d to make it rain. It seems there has been a very long drought and they have prayed and danced and drummed, all to no avail. Our hero says, “My G-d doesn’t work like that,” meaning that he did not believe that his prayers would produce the much desired rain on demand. They insist he pray. He responds again, “My G-d doesn’t work like that” and then the heavens open up and the rain begins to fall- lots of it- and the people are ecstatic, and our hero says “…and sometimes, just like that, He changes His mind.”

I think of that whenever I am in a situation that seems hopeless. Things are not going well and despite a lot of effort, nothing seems to help. And then, all of a sudden, things get better. It happens to therapy clients. It happens to people in interpersonal relationships. It happens to people who are learning to do something that is awkward and difficult and then suddenly, it is second nature.

Life seems sometimes to offer discontinuous results. Things pop out of the air– things that one might have wished or hoped or prayed or worked hard for- and suddenly, at the most unexpected time, they happen. Good things.

Each year, just before Rosh HaShana I try to think of what I would like to wish those I love. Maybe this year, it be that these types of wonderful surprises will happen for them.

Filed Under: Family life, Ramblings, Spirituality

If my life were a Hallmark film

September 10, 2008 by

The film could open with the caption “September 10, 1972 — Fort Campbell, Kentucky”

We would be sitting around the kitchen table:
my husband in uniform

Benjy, blond haired, sparkling blue-eyed, inquisitive, 5 years old
Rachel, long silky haired, always busy, bubbly, full of laughter, 3 years old
Shmuly, curly brown-haired, devilish grinned, very cuddlesome, almost 2 years old
Akiva, blond haired, blue eyed baby, 5 months old

My husband would say to me, “Happy Birthday!” and I would look around the table and feel totally blessed. And he would say, “Now what do you wish for?”

And I would answer, “I want all of these children to have wonderful happy, healthy lives and to grow up and do meaningful things– to be kind to each other and to other people- to be sensitive and caring.

And he would say, “But for yourself…”

And I would say, “I want to live to see them grow up to adulthood.”

And he would say, “What would be your wildest dream?”

And I would say, “OK, I want to live to see Akiva’s wife give birth to their 6th child”

And he would laugh. And I would laugh, looking at our tiny baby.

And then the film would fade to today– and we would be picking up the phone and hearing,

“It’s a boy!”

Filed Under: Family life, Parenting, Ramblings

Notes

September 3, 2008 by

Note to OB/GYN staff: If the woman is doubled over in pain by contractions that have been coming every 2.5 minutes for the last 6 hours, she *is* in labor and deserves a place to lie down.

Note to charge person at labor and delivery: If a patient’s advocate tells you that there is no staff person– no doctor, nurse, midwife, or janitor– in the triage area for the last 20 minutes and then tells you they’ve checked by opening the doors of all of the rooms (all 4 of them) and finding no one, please try not to say “There is a midwife there.”

Note to big hospital complex: A place that sells foodstuffs other than soda, coffee and over-sugared pastries (perhaps even a vending machine!) should be open 24 hours.

Note to Hadassah ladies: We love your medical center. It is big and beautiful. It has lots of nice buildings, lots of intelligent, innovative and very kind people working there. Please send us some more anesthesiologists so that a woman in labor can get an epidural in less than 5 hours from when she is promised.

Note to G-d: Thank you for letting me witness a miracle today.

Filed Under: Family life, Ramblings

A embarrassment of riches

August 31, 2008 by

I hope I am not the only one to sometimes look at my life and wonder what I did to deserve all that has been given to me.

We have had a couple of wonderful weeks with children and grandchildren. We have enjoyed immensely the visit of our “bonus” grandson- a kind and clever and bright child who seemed to fit in perfectly with his “cousins.” We are imminently anticipating the birth of two more precious ones…

And today, after about 12 emails of discussion among the family members as to what to do and how and where to do it, we all got together. The problem was not only scheduling, which is always a problem, but also what to do with 23 children in the middle of the day when the sidewalks were hot enough to fry eggs that would meet the needs of little people from 5 months to 12 years (the two 14 year olds were not able to make it). In the end, we showed a movie in our living room with our video projector. It was cool in the house and believe it or not, there were enough seats for all of the children as well as the 12 adults. (Strangely enough, the 4 pregnant women all ended up sitting in the kitchen area…)

Although the pizza delivery took over 1.5 hours from when we ordered it, the pizza was hot (yeah, that was a no-brainer!) and even delicious. And there I was literally surrounded by love in every direction.

Tomorrow our “bonus” grandchild goes home. The other children start school. It was good that we all got to celebrate together the end of the summer vacation.

Filed Under: Family life, Ramblings

All alone by the telephone

August 27, 2008 by

Let me preface this posting by noting that since we returned from our US adventure, there have been almost no moments without major activity. Between getting together with children, having grandchildren staying with us, trying to plan for our renovations, seeing clients, and now answering Shai Bar Ilan Geographical Tours toll-free US number on my cell phone, I have been very busy. And although our visitors left the home neat and the linens folded, I don’t have the house looking the way I want it to look.

And I didn’t imagine that I would get a chance to do anything before all of the kiddies are back in school and until the baby we are waiting for (the first of 4 due in the next 5 months) is born.

So today, when my husband took our son-in-law and his son (who is visiting from the States) to mini-Israel, I thought he would be back in an hour or so and our frenetic pace would continue. But he didn’t come back. And the time passed. And although I could have called him, I just kept waiting and watched a little TV (Fox News, to catch up on the latest in the presidential campaign) and read some things on the computer… when a couple of minutes ago (3.5 hours after he left) I got a call from my daughter telling me that they had gone out shopping and that he would be home soon.

And I realized that I had just spent 3.5 hours doing essentially nothing. Aside from answering a couple of emails and a couple of phone calls, I have been alone and idle.

It feels good.

And now, a word from our sponsor…………………………………….(just kidding… I do this all for fun!)

There are a lot of reasons why people should come on our trips to China and to Vietnam/Cambodia. Maybe someday I will list them– but the best reason is that they are fun. On these trip our travelers learn about the history and culture of the countries, see amazing things, visit gorgeous places, meet wonderful people and most of all have a lot of fun. We laugh and enjoy ourselves all day, all the time. We eat delicious food and we spend time with people who will remain our friends long after the trip is over. People who live far apart from siblings or parents find our trips great opportunities to spend time together when no one has to worry about cooking or cleaning or others’ work schedules. If you or anyone you know is interested in our trips, let me know.

Filed Under: China, Family life, Ramblings
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